The CPS has published on its website recommendations for visitors to the barbershop. “Currently in Russia are becoming a popular barbershop is beauty salons exclusively for men, where you can make cut to shape moustache and beard, shave” — found in the Department.
In Russia’s recent history this has not happened! Men, instead of all the energy of their minds, hearts and tired hands to give the construction of the narrow gauge, the white sea canal and the development of virgin lands, have decided to engage in their own, terrible to say, appearance. And not, as was customary in the good Soviet times: Boxing, poluboks and “canadian” as the pinnacle of hairdressing. Not that “the Builder of communism” was “smelly, powerful and hairy,” but concern about attractive appearance to advertise was not accepted.
Now spoiled by the noxious influence of the West men began to look in the mirror no less beautiful half of humanity. Manicure, pedicure, waxing, peels, vitamin injections… And then there’s the stubble and beards of different styles of fashion went… In General, appeared in untouched by civilization and intellect (ordinary, artificial about the existence of a country not yet realize) Russia is a strange place called a barbershop, in which species the males of this masculinity are depriving yourself (and who knows, if only figuratively!).
The public immediately suspected something was wrong, linking their appearance with all sorts of gay men, metrosexuals and other office hamsters. Of course, excited, and on her behalf went on a crusade to the barbershop the public authorities, the Cossacks, paratroopers, bikers, and along with them deputies led by Vladimir Zhirinovsky, and Vitaly milonova.
Wolfowitz, a Holy thing, loudly demanded that these institutions immediately renamed “strigoli” and a champion of Orthodox morality, with downcast eyes, confessed that he stops regularly at the barbershop. But then hastily added that where it happens, is gay (personally tested?), and all the polls are “normal large traditional barbers”.
But on the background of CPS they both looked almost worthy representatives of the 21st century. This is public enterprises, as befits a bureaucratic people, had “wild and silly”, why, and hurried to release detailed instructions on how to behave in the barbershop.
In the document, in particular, are reminded that the bearded man is supposed to follow, whether the master wash their hands before work, and to observe the use of sterile instruments and supplies. As soon as did not think to clarify that with a straight razor the Barber not to cut the throat of his client. Without the teachings of the CPS, this one would not have guessed.
Most of the inhabitants of our country ABCs basic sanitation was held under the guidance of the grandmother in a gentle toddlers. In the CPS, however, seems to have collected in one place the unfortunates who had this wisdom to master on their own is dangerous to health and life experience, which they generously share in a hurry.
Blessed organization! We thought that the CPS day and night are busy saving the Russians from smuggling sanctions and disguised as drugs and alcohol. No! They find strength and time to make the instructions on all occasions. Hardly anyone would be surprised if its recommendations on how to properly empty your bowel and bladder in a public toilet. Or they already exist and operate?
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