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“Petrov and Bocharov” took place in Russian folklore

Alleged Russian secret service Ruslan Bashirov and Alexander Petrov, which the West accused of poisoning ex-GRU Colonel Sergei Skripal and his daughter Julia in Salisbury in March 2018, has already occupied a firm place in Russian folklore.

They are not only told anecdotes, but also compose songs, poems. They became heroes of rhymes.

Two Slepakova did not escape his creative history of the hapless “GRU agent”.

First, comedian, producer, author and performer of songs the artist has sung comic “Song of salsarita the spire” dedicated to the controversial interview, “Salisbury tourists” who were thought to be homosexuals. A few days later Alexander Slepakov, candidate of philosophical Sciences, poet, and also the author of lyrical and satirical songs, he offered his poetic variation of their difficult life path.

Version Alexander Slepakov, Petrov and Bashirov not immediately engaged in “sports nutrition, vitamins, minerals, protein and so on”, as told in the famous interview on RT Alexander Petrov. Slepakov made up a story that began with agents like regular shuttles, writes EG.ru.

The plot is based on the old “operation”, in which Petrov and Bashirov, according to one version, was involved. But since this story is not just fictional and has no relationship to reality, the author found it possible to keep the names of these heroes.

Each Shuttle Bashirova –
The brave Shuttle Petrov,
They work together
With a dashing nineties

Together the goods delivered,
“With a bag, not a coward!”,
Together not just redeemed
In Brest detained cargo.

Together drove the currency
Bribed cops
A reliable contact at the customs office
Searched here and there.

Care, labor and anxiety
They were divided on two
And at the Cherkizovsky market
Many knew them.

They always in the road:
Grenoble, Berlin, Potsdam,
For a long time they don’t need bags
To run the trains

The goods carry the heavy
Are Bank payments
In business open
New frontiers.

Husband Petrov and Bashirov,
Experience went for them for the future,
But what and how will turn
Often do not know the Shuttle.

And once with cornices
The truck went to Rostov,
In Warsaw shipped Bashirov,
Waited at the border Petrov.

Everything went like clockwork,
Leaving The EU
The truck disappeared into the mist,
And with her vanished the goods.

In a cozy cafe in Lviv
Petrov and Bashirov sit
Waiting for someone,
Drink and eat delicious.

Here he came, custom,
He said, give the nod,
Left for other documents
Eaves will come in Ro…

In the sense in Rostov, but
I don’t want money,
And you tell me something, bitch
Make for the country!

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Petrov and Bashirov shocked:
No money? What’s the surprise?
Rarely, the customs broker
Has such a whim.

But he said, do you think
I need your fucking load?
All this is just a cover
I am a Colonel of the GRU!

While you’re cashing in
That’s just a mess,
Carry any contraband,
Eating and drinking cognac…

For all of us to come
Hard times
Multiplying provocations
It’s almost war.

Stood Colonel and finger
They were shown on the screen.
On the wall in the TV
Roared and smoked independence.

You will listen to orders
Putin and Shoigu
Otherwise,your curtain rods,
I personally burn!

Petrov and Bocharov stood up,
Hands they shook,
Lips finely shook
Tears from my eyes flowed.

Now you serve the Motherland,
At ease, unable to sit down!
Petrov and Bashirov, turning pale,
Said in a whisper: “There!”

And here the eaves in the warehouse
Some men
Loaded into an empty truck
Boxes and bags,

Furniture, lamps, paintings,
Even the door handles,
Quiet Petrov and Bashirov
Shouting into the darkness: “come on!”

And that it is impossible to imagine
Even in this fucked up century
Near Kharkiv among the cargo
Was placed people.

Here is the truck already in Duranske,
There is one captain,
Old partner Bashirova,
For a friend just Tigran.

Without their customs
To Ukraine is impossible,
When the problem goods
Taken to the Russian friends.

To urgently release the truck
Tigran will make its
Russian Novoshakhtinsk
The Colonel waiting for her.

Tigran in front of the monitor
Rubs eyes
But promised as much
There is no way back.

The truck is on the x-ray.
Bad things can happen,
And the old Shuttle Bashirov
The word holds always.

The Sergeant said in a low voice:
– That metal pot!..
The cornice does not look like!
– Ledge, – says Tigran.

– And those at the top of the picture
Did they eaves?
– Yes, they are part of the cornice
Mounted where the bottom.

And those boxes with the money
Well, except the cornices are they?
– Cornices, – Tigran responds
– You better look here.

And writes some numerals
Him on a piece of paper Tigran,
The Sergeant nods,
They say, well, captain.

But, springing from his chair,
Finger pokes Sergeant:
– Look, there Yanukovych!
Honestly, the guarantor!

But extract not losing,
Waving Tigran hand:
– Nonsense! Where do you see!
This curtain rod!

Look, fat face,
What are those who drink
She is a part of the scenery,
To emphasize the comfort.

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Five fat chins,
This
To beautiful waves
Hung curtains on it.

The belly is a symbol of wealth
Walking in contentment days
And ass so tightly
The ledge against the wall.

And varicose legs
The cornice is also needed!..
Were saved Yanukovych
And exported from the country.

Now Petrov and Bashirov
Always help GRU
Use old ties,
Subtly lead the game.

They’re almost on the service
Something like that.
Bit of a pity eaves,
But homeland first!

Jokes and memes about the “poisoners Skrypalia” Petrov and Bashirova

***
Escaped from Russia now the traitors will not just destruction, but also the maximum humiliation – from now on they will only poison the buggers.

***
Gay Petrov and Bashirov held onto the handle. It was the handle of the front door of the scout Skripal.

***
– Petrov and Bashirov received a coded message: “Center for Ustasa… You buggers”. Petrov and Bashirov tears, they realized that the home he was awarded the title of hero.

***
Holmes, why the investigation into the poisoning Skripal stalled?
– Elementary, Watson: beginners luck.

***
The Armenian radio asked:
– And why in March over London there is such dense fog?
Is a Russian poison their traitors.

***
“Oscar” this year will get an interview Petrov and Bashirova.

***
Petrov and Bashirov told that they are normal businessmen of an average hand. It turns out that GRU is in addition to the right and left there is also an average hand, and it threatens to reach everyone.

 

Stirlitz sitting in a cafe “Elefant”. At the next table a stranger mixed in a test tube chemicals. “Beginner” – thought Stirlitz. pic.twitter.com/PjvpURgLUc

Natalia Alontseva (@n_alontseva) 14 Mar 2018

 

 

Bashirov and Petrov. The beginning. pic.twitter.com/J2A4rEKl74

— Valery Edges (@baza9903) 5 Oct 2018

 

 

The painting of mort Kunstler “Skripal daughters Solsberijsky protects the temple from Bashirova and Petrov” pic.twitter.com/fsQJJjjwpZ

— Hereditary Vohra (@Konik1954) October 8, 2018

 

 

Limericks about Petrov and Bashirova

Russian video blogger, comedian, author of sketches Yuri Khovanskii (MS__) in your YouTube posted ditties about Bashirova and Petrov.

Nothing blame me death
I’m an ordinary man.
There worked experts,
Well, I am a newbie…

With each other we are not gay at all.
But away from the homeland
To see just wanted
The huge spires.

They say that we’re involved
To power structures is different.
If you ask in response
I answer: “no, sir!”…

 

 

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