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Anger, bargaining and acceptance. Culture shock Russian women in China

Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае

“Native culture denies the culture of the new country, and at first a new sensation perceived by the brain as a kind of adventure”. Alexander has lived in China for six months, worked there in the famous hotel in XI’an. And she had to endure a lot: and the rise of the spirit, and his specific, hopeless decline. She believes that it is an incomparable experience, and China girl are grateful for many things. Now it is easier to let go of what is happening, it is a long journey, helped her to change for the better.

Alexander told his story of culture shock within the five stages of acceptance, are known to all. It was a really thorny path of self-acceptance, of others and absolutely alien to the Russian people culture:

Denial

The atmosphere is completely different culture dumbfounded, and you unconsciously start to compare how it is here, and as the house. And “home” is necessarily correct, right, normal, as it should be. Native culture denies the culture of the new country, and at first a new sensation perceived by the brain as a kind of adventure. For example, the first time crazy the hospitality and generosity of Chinese were confusing to me, the awkwardness was swept away, and the Chinese indiscretion coupled with their extreme shyness was just the highlight of my indignation. How is that even possible?
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

Unusual was and some domestic moments, such as the ritual of ordering food in catering in China, and no one ever orders a dish just for yourself, on the contrary, bought only but more on all that “no one is left hungry.”
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

And now, the entire first month in China my first observation excited the most interest, some curiosity, but I stayed alone in the side of all of this, naively believing that I am a kind overseas, nothing to do with business.

Anger

By the middle of the second month in the country is a denial of the alien mentality moved to irritability, and so we get to the anger stage. The difference of cultures had ceased to be entertainment and endless misunderstandings along with the language barrier began to deliver a lot of inconvenience.

Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

I’m a straight man, and in situations of uncertainty I am very uncomfortable, so in China, every day I pledge myself. Clearly, this highly contextuality manifested in a production environment, when the praise of my superiors were very thinly veiled claims (alas, not once I found out). Or requirements, involving one, was fraught with an entirely different connotation. Here such here a complex Chinese ishimine drove me crazy from day to day.

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In short, gradually began to open hard-hitting features of the Chinese culture, and the irritation inside me began to nakipari, anger accumulated, and all this inevitably entailed conflict. Conflicts because of different things, but they are United is always the same: a difference of cultures.

Torg

Stage of bargaining was, perhaps, a kind of turning point, which led me to an early adoption. When the energy to care no longer remained, I made the only right decision – to surrender. Just let it be, just let it go. Oh, to drift is a very Chinese style.

My bargaining was to try to understand people around me and to stop resisting, but this does not mean that I like what is happening around.
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

No more “why?” no more “we are in the country…” – no, stop, enough. I’m not in Russia, these rules don’t work here. In the course were even learning the language, which, incidentally, gave me some fruit. Especially me, as a linguist, was particularly interesting to learn Chinese identity through the language component.

Take, for example, the standard question “how are you?”, I at first often used in conversations with colleagues and friends. However, the response was laughter or disbelief. Starting to learn the language, I learned the meaning of the phrase you hear very often, “ni chi fan le ma?” (“have you eaten?”) — this question turned out to be extremely important within the Chinese culture and expresses your concern in relation to the interlocutor. But “how are you?” has a completely blank value for the Chinese.

At the stage of bargaining was hard to alter yourself, your attitude, manner of communication. But required work, required by the environment, demanded by China itself, and I knew it. Generally, this period was quite interesting, in retrospect. And in General it sounds good, right? But for a long time I wasn’t enough, and despair took precedence over persistence. Attempts to integrate into the culture and become part of it often ended in failure (well, or so I thought because of personal stubbornness), and were easier to engage in cultural separatism, rather than integration.

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Depression

I travel a lot and often leave the house for a long time, but for the first time in my life, I was violently homesick. I’m sick of local food, all these incomprehensible and indigestible vegetable stew, a complete absence of any dairy products (Oh, how I missed mashed potatoes and cottage cheese!). A couple of weeks and I did have some real food eating is absolutely harmful, but more than the usual stuff.
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае

I even stopped to go out because of insane traffic, crowds, loud (very loud) the Chinese and the constant looks in my direction would have finished me completely.
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

On the fifth month of stay in China nature is forever seeking adventure traveler faded in me, and I couldn’t help thinking that China is not my thing. But suddenly it happened that I had to go home three months earlier than planned, due to the visa problems. And in my head something clicked.

The adoption

The realization that in two weeks I go home, really cheered me. And all those little things that I hated, I surprisingly had accepted and loved. So, in a moment. I realized that I like this Chinese identity, like the one around does not understand and to play the endless charade with colleagues.
Гнев, торг и принятие. Культурный шок россиянки в Китае
@davsenorm

Running across roads, dodging rushing cars outside the rules, drinking beer out of the stacks, ordering huge portions of noodles or rice for 100 rubles, using the Chinese language and gestures more often and answering the questions of others a La “no why” – I realized that part of me has merged with the Chinese culture that this process was irrevocably launched, and I will never take out China from your lifestyle. Even my Chinese friends began to notice that I was “acetals” and at times behave quite like a local.

I went back home and never cease to yearn. Especially miss the evening dancing Chinese grandmothers on the streets and in parks. They always fascinated me.

My conclusions are as follows: China is an absolute unity, kindness and perseverance, the incredible nature, history and architecture that cannot fail to delight. But at the same time, China is such a noisy, illogical and unbearable implicit. And probably this is the highlight of this country.

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